“I have found that if you love life, life will love you back”
You know that precise moment when you stop and you ask yourself ‘Why is everything not the way I want it to be?!’, and you kind of feel sorry for yourself. You are disorganised, to sure what to do and feel overwhelmed. Yes that moment. For random reasons you are not happy, you wish you had a different career, lived in another city, or were enjoying permanent holiday. Whatever it might be, for me it was the moment when I was complaining because my family lives 700 km far from me, my boyfriend and I had a long distance relationship, because I was doing my internship and I had no chance to back home when I wanted…and I can continue. Now, the question is: Do you prefer to keep doing this way or do you want to react and start looking at things differently? Do you want to change the way you feel or put new things in motion? I went for the second option and I discovered an interesting world.
First of all, it’s all about the attitude, your happiness, your satisfaction. Your inner peace cannot depend on anything else than the way you approach different situations and your overall behaviour.
The key is to switch your mind and focus on the positives. If you want a hint, I suggest to follow two YouTubers that share their ideas and experiences on the topic and they have the right words to wake you up or realise you are not alone. They are Mimi and Alex Ikonn and they have been a real inspiration for me. As soon as I started thinking about the positive side before the negative, I felt how useless complaining is, how it doesn’t attract positivity but only negativity and other complaints. It is like a vicious circle that you cannot get out of unless you change your attitude. Even though it seems easy when it’s said in this way, well it’s not. Bad days will always happen, problems will always appear and your routine, unless you change it, won’t magically transform. But it is up to you, you can decide what to do, if you want to be passive and victim of your own decisions and life or if you want to be reactive and make a change.
There are couple of tools that I find extremely useful: the first is my amazing ‘Happiness planner’, a lovely journal that has been gifted to me from one of my best friends and partner in crime behind this blog. The journal is a structured planner, with different sections. In the first part you will find some questions that make you think about your feelings, what matters to you, the main traits of your personality… just to be aware of what’s going on in your head. Then the structure is like a normal planner for each day, but with a peculiarity: it’s all focused on the positive things. Each day starts with the sentence ‘Today I am excited about…’ and ‘Today’s main focus’…up to you to fill it as you prefer, day by day. You will notice how useless it is to write down negative thoughts and how much better you will feel noticing that everyday something good happens. I personally believe in these tools as a way to remind yourself how important it is to set your mindset on a positive track. It makes you way more productive and it improves the relationship with other people, because we know it, if you are positive you attract positive people, positive thoughts and healthy relationships.
Mimi and Alex Ikonn developed a similar tool called ‘The five minute journal’, I am currently using and loving it so much. The principle is the same, it’s about writing down each day, black on white, what you are grateful for. Gratefulness, such a powerful feeling. Just stop for a second and think about it, I am pretty sure you agree.
I’m not here to teach you how to live, I’m here to share what worked for me. Thus, this is just food for thoughts, it’s not gonna solve the problems of your life overnight, but if ot can help you focus more on beautiful things that happen to you (yes they do happen, even if you don’t notice it), why shouldn’t you give it a shot? 😉 These are not only tools to make you feel better, but actually pursue some new actions, writing down your plans, ideas and visions is so powerful.
…and remember, ‘Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it’ (Mindful Diary)
Here the links for the Five Minute Journal, Mimi and Alex Ikonn’s YouTube channels, and the Happiness Planner.